christmas music is my favorite.
it stinks when you think you're out of a funk, but you realize you've just been able to hide it for awhile. my birthday last week helped.
i realized today that i'm just as lonely as my first day in arizona. i realized today that a certain problem that i thought had gotten better is eating away at me. i realized today that i'm lonely. i realized today i have made friends, but i feel like i'm at the point of bugging most of them. i realized today that i'm not enjoying things or reaching out as much.
you know those shows and movies where the characters just need to dance out a problem. meredith grey always seemed to feel better after she had danced out her problems. i always laughed and thought she was silly. but as i was feeling quite down, i cranked up my christmas music in my ear buds and just jammed out to "sleigh ride." and you know what? i felt better. i truly didn't care who saw me. and i truly felt my problems dissolve. even if it was for a few minutes.
they say it's always darkest before the dawn.
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