08 February 2011

Sometimes Life is Hard

I'm so behind...
Letter Writing
Valentine Making
Goal Making

I feel rather burnt out. Not so much because of everything I've done, but everything I have to do.

I don't usually get personal on my blog, but I think it's time to show some vulnerability.

I feel my life is a bit inadequate, and I feel the steps to make it not so, are hard.

I've had to make some big decisions and let things go in the past week.

I've had to learn that just because somethings makes you feel good doesn't mean it's right for you.

What am I talking about?

Boys and my future...

I'm not going to go into much detail but it's like this...
I like Boy A, Boy A doesn't know who he likes. Boy B likes me. I don't reciprocate Boy B's feelings. So, instead of trying to vie for attention, I decided to cut off both boys. Less drama, less work, less mess.

My Future:
I'm not sure what God wants me to do next... I feel like I'm so far away from where I need to be...
I have dreams: owning a bakery, singing, acting.
But, what are God's dreams for my life right now?

Sometimes life is hard...

I've become an insomniac... Even when I don't have any caffeine, because the weight of my worries and problems are so heavy, I am unable to get rest.
 I know what you might say...
"Don't sweat it Ren. Things will come together."
"Give your problems to Jesus, and you will find peace."

Well, I don't sweat it, but it seems to sweat me. I do give my problems to Jesus, and I have joy. But, I still don't have answers...

This is a very long post for me, and things still aren't getting done. It's time to just write a huge list of things that NEED to get done, and maybe once those things are accomplished clarity will follow.

Lord, give me strength to do what You have called me to do. Give me peace so that I can hear Your voice clearly. Give me joy so that I might spread Your love. Give me love, so that I may know who I am in You.

Thanks for reading. I don't apologize for the long post.

This post is not:
Me giving up blogging
Me throwing in the towel

This post is:
Me writing out my weaknesses
Me sharing unshared parts of me
Me needed an outlet to unwind

28 Days of Love will continue this evening!

03 February 2011

My Gadgets/My Daily Websites

I have many gadgets that I use almost daily...

1. Blackberry (I call it my crapberry)
Image via here

2. I-touch
Image via here

3. Macbook
Image via here

4. Kindle

The websites I check everyday include:

What are your gadgets?
What are your daily websites?

I ♥ My Family - 28 Days of Love - Day 3

My Family

 My Dad:
Because he's kind and loving.
I'm so much like my dad.
We're both introverted... 
We love to read...
We love music...
I followed in his footsteps and became a music major as well!

 My Mom:
Because she's always there for me. 
She loves me more than I'll ever know.
I'm also a lot like my mother.
We're both sensitive...
We are learners...
We both love to serve other people...

 My Brother:
We're only 14 months apart! (I'm older)
Because he always knows how to cheer me up.

We can finish each other's sentences. 
We share music and friends.
And we' ve shared the first 17 years of my life together.
He was my first best friend.
 My Sister:
Christmas Day on the Cruise
Because she's my mini-me.
She looks up to me more than anyone else I know.
She always wants to hang out.

And she's just so darn cute!
We're 11 years apart.

Do you see why I  my family???
They're totally awesome!

What do you love today?
Link up!

02 February 2011

28 Days of Love - Link up

Are you enjoying 28 Days of Love?
If so, link up! I'd love to see what you love!
Grab the button on the side.

God Bless,

24 Things I want to do Before I turn 25 -Revisited/Revamped

This needs a little revamping!
Black = changed goal

  1. Go to a Nebraska Husker Football Game.
  2. Go to the College World Series
  3. Road Trip to Springfield, MO - To visit Red Velvet
  4. Buy a Nice DSLR
  5. Go to Omaha at least at least 5 times
  6. Learn to Make Sushi
  7. Learn to Crochet
  8. Learn to Play Guitar
  9. Read the Bible in a Year
  10. Get out of Debt (loans)
  11. Learn to Work with Clay
  12. Go to a Roller Derby Game
  13. Read at least 12 Books
  14. Save $1500 
  15. Re-decorate My Room
  16. Start learning french
  17. Go to a music festival
  18. Grow My Mark. Business
  19. Get Down to My Ideal Weight
  20. Sew at least Once a Month
  21. Take the GRE
  22. Make a Quilt
  23. Spend My Money Wisely
  24. Go Sledding

February Reading List

1. Scarlet Letter (finish)
2. Eat Pray Love

What are you reading this month?

I ♥ Me - 28 Days of Love - Day 2

I ♥ ME
I didn't always love who I am.
I thought I wasn't pretty enough
Or thin enough
Or smart enough
Or desired enough
Or strong enough
I think you get the picture
But, now, I can say that I love myself. 
When I gained that love for myself, I started to change as a person!
I had joy all the time. 
People wanted to be around me!
I lost 20 lbs without trying.
And I didn't feel like I had to live up to anyone's expectations.
That picture was taken when I was a bit heavier, but I'm ok with sharing it because I'm not defined by what I look like, but by the shape of my character.
I've never been one to clog my blog (teehee) with pictures of myself, but that's just an insecurity)

So, I thought I'd share just a few more with you!
I'm not a poser, I just like to pose.
I think I was the cutest kid ever...

That's me and my best friend Carrie (who is in the Peace Corps in Azerbijan)

I am rarely serious in pictures... It's just not in my nature...
And here's one more for good measure!
I miss those sunglasses!
PS. That's a scar... I've had 2 open heart surgeries!

Clarification: I love myself, because Jesus loves me!

Blog Giveaways

Valentine Giveaway at Sunshine and Carousels 
Super cute valentine giveaway at Strumpets Crumpets
February Sponsor Giveaway at Sometimes Sweet
Kaelah Bee is giving away a camera at Little Chief Honeybee

Check all these wonderful giveaways out!

01 February 2011

February Goals

1. Lose 5lbs (I'm currently around 156 - I'd like to see 150-51, but that seems to be my plateau)
2. Organize magazines - I have at least 50 unread magazines just floating around my room
3. Save at least $300
4. Find a second job (carried over from January)
5. Dye my hair (carried over from January

I ♥ Jesus Christ - 28 Days of Love - Day 1

Welcome to the first day of 28 Days of Love!

The first day is brought you by the letter J...
Haha. Sorry, I wanted to say that...

Each day I'm going to say one thing I love.

I thought I'd start with something that's closest to my heart.

No pictures needed because there were no pictures taken of this man.

I Jesus

Here's a video expressing why I love Jesus!