is my faith showing?

There are times when I didn't want to share my faith. I wanted to be the "cool" christian. Who did what everyone else did.

That got me no where fast.

Then I woke up.

The Person I was running away from was the very Person I needed to be running to.

I love Jesus, with every fiber of my being. He's my All in All.

Daily, I have to dethrone myself and let Him take reign again.

I'm not the same person I was last year, last week, or yesterday. I don't hang out with the same people. I can't. There have been a few times when all I want to do is hide in my old lifestyle. But, that tug is so much smaller then the PULL from my Savior!

What I watch, listen to, and read are different. I've purged so many things out of my life. I rarely listen to secular music, even when that itch to listen to Mumford and Sons sneaks up on me, I'm ready with a simple answer:

Philippians 4:8: Finally brothers, whatever is TRUE, whatever is NOBLE, whatever is RIGHT, whatever is PURE, whatever is LOVELY, whatever is ADMIRABLE - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things.

Sadly, most of their music doesn't fit into that verse.

I'm not yelling, judging, or preaching. I'm not trying to condemn or even convict. But, I am sharing my heart. I don't want this blog to be something that is superficial. I'm not superficial, so everything that represents me shouldn't be either.

I love tv, it's apparent in my old posts. The excitement for a new season of shows, the anticipation of old ones. I just can't do it anymore. There are still some things that I watch that could lead others astray, but I've been learning to spend less time on things that aren't beneficial for me.

1 Corinthians 6:12: All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any. (NKJV)

I love how scripture helps me make decisions. There are so many things I've "dipped my toes in," and if I'd read the Bible with the help of the Holy Spirit, I would have never "gotten wet." My appetite for things of this world were stronger than my appetite for Jesus.

So, now we've arrived to the title of this piece... is my faith showing?

I mean I hope so. What does that question mean?

Am I only posting about Jesus, Bible verses, and my "blessed life" via facebook, instagram, twitter, my blog, etc.?

The real answer is no. I do show my faith, I just don't let my faith show me.

What? I know you're trying to figure out that last statement.

Let me break it down: I'm not going to share my faith to be showy. I've cut down on my sharing of Bible verses on instagram because it was to get likes (BIG HONESTY MOMENT). God isn't looking to see how many "likes" I have. He's only looking at my heart. The same heart that ran away from Him. The same heart that struggles every day to surrender. The same heart that gets caught up in everything else. The same heart that adores Him and wants more than anything for that adoration to grow.                                    

My "blessed life" is a redeemed. My life isn't just roses and fairytales, but real crap and dilemmas too.

I am who Jesus died for. I am redeemed.

Finally brothers, think on such things: Whatever is TRUE (Lord, may I speak only the truth, and since You are Truth, may Your praise be continually on my lips), whatever is NOBLE (God, I want stand up for You), whatever is RIGHT (Jesus, may I clothed in righteousness), whatever is PURE (God, may what I think, say, and do be pure), whatever is LOVELY (I want to be known as someone who is thought of as a woman of God), whatever is ADMIRABLE (May I do something because it's the right thing to do, not for show), - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things (God, may I strive for excellence in all You have called me to do).  - Amen